Brian Melanson
Full Member
Showrunner & Co-Admin
One Change. One Chance
Posts: 207
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Post by Brian Melanson on Jun 28, 2009 22:41:50 GMT -5
Welcome to Serenity Falls,New Hampshire. A small town along Lake Winnipesaukee . There's shopping, sight seeing and one more thing. Unsolved murders. Ten years ago the town was destroyed and there were nineteen murders. The killer has not been found till this day. But a certain event set him or her off again... A family reunion. Caught in the middle of Murders. Based off the CBS Mini Series: Harper's Island and from the creator of V.A.M.P...nothing is what it seems to be. Anyone could be the KILLER. Anyone could be the VICTIM. Anyone could be NEXT... a Thirteen Episode event. Can they find the killer before they find them? Serenity Falls
One Killer,Thirty Victims, One Town Starring: Britney Snow as Hailey Jones - The Local Emma Watson as Olivia Carson - The Party Girl Nicholas Brendon as Jason Bedding - The Drop Out Jennifer Love Hewitt as Lily Jones - The Wife David Conrad as Brett Jones - The Husband Nathan Fillion as Kyle Hart - The Loner Sarah Michelle Geller as Carrie Benson - The Drama Queen Robert Pattinson as Jake Rater - The Ex - Boyfriend Mandy Moore as Carter Baker - The Hidden Gem Amy Acker as Drew Benson - The Smart Girl Alan Tudyk as Harry Mends - The Heart Throb Miley Cyrus as Jenny Ingerson - The City Gal and Chris O'Donnell as Paul Ingerson - The Brother UPDATES COMING SOON! |
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Post by Chris Davis on Jun 30, 2009 15:53:17 GMT -5
Hey I really like it!!! You've chosen a pretty colorful cast! I also really like the title of the series, makes me want to read the pilot! Nice job with this one Brian! You may have something great here! Can't wait to hear more!
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Brian Melanson
Full Member
Showrunner & Co-Admin
One Change. One Chance
Posts: 207
|
Post by Brian Melanson on Jul 1, 2009 8:31:59 GMT -5
NOTE THIS IS A ONE SEASON SERIES!
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Post by Jack D. Malone on Jul 2, 2009 0:26:25 GMT -5
This reminds me too much of Harpers Island. (computer stuffed up)...anyways...I enjoy the plot, the amount of characters which I think may be hard to fit into every episode, that is if they're not dying, lol. I think its good for this to a one season thing...
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Brian Melanson
Full Member
Showrunner & Co-Admin
One Change. One Chance
Posts: 207
|
Post by Brian Melanson on Jul 3, 2009 23:14:05 GMT -5
Thanks Jack. LOL But its gonna be fun thinking of new ways to kill people off. I hope to have the pilot up soon so everyone can read into the adventures of Serenity Falls!
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Brian Melanson
Full Member
Showrunner & Co-Admin
One Change. One Chance
Posts: 207
|
Post by Brian Melanson on Jul 3, 2009 23:27:18 GMT -5
THE PILOT IS UP ITS ONLY 6 pages due to the fact but I am writing more!
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Post by Jack D. Malone on Jul 4, 2009 1:32:03 GMT -5
I'm not a huge fan of this, from what you've written at the moment, but that's based on the 6-page pilot you've seemed to have whipped up. I will knock things down, giving you a review, with a goods and bads list, to hopefully help you make it better.
The Goods:
-The characters all have a past with one another.
-The distinctive diologue that separates each character.
The Bads:
-The presentation; I really recommend you get an actual script writing program instead of just using WORD. It is really hard to read your work. There is an AWESOME word update if you don't want to buy Final Draft called "Script Genie".
-The lack of suspense. For a somewhat drama/thriller kind of show which it seems you're going for with this min-series, I suggest you try and build up suspense. Put the person you're about to kill in the worst kind of fear that makes us literally scared for that person.
-Try and be a bit more descriptive with the action parts.
I really LOVE your pitch for the show, but I think the 6 page pilot wasn't what I expected. I can't wait for the full pilot, because I really love how you write you're characters and show their personality, but the action/movements/descriptive parts need a bit of improvement.
5/10
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Brian Melanson
Full Member
Showrunner & Co-Admin
One Change. One Chance
Posts: 207
|
Post by Brian Melanson on Jul 4, 2009 8:13:28 GMT -5
Thats OK Jack Its just to show the teaser I am currently re writting it and and its going to be continuing on into about 30 pages. But I am currently trying to finish up some episodes of V.A.M.P but i hope to have the finished version up soon this is like a trailer kind of thing. And I just tried Script Genie and its AMAZING I like this and it is easier to write scripts. Thanks for the the tip!
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Post by Jack D. Malone on Jul 4, 2009 8:49:00 GMT -5
Awesome. Its good your using it. I can't wait to read the full pilot to this.
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Brian Melanson
Full Member
Showrunner & Co-Admin
One Change. One Chance
Posts: 207
|
Post by Brian Melanson on Jul 5, 2009 11:53:49 GMT -5
HEy Everyone that is reading the pilot! Please understand that it is not quite done yet but i thought i could get up what i had. A newer one is on the way and to my hope you can all enjoy it!! So get ready and if the show gets picked up i will be making a Serenity Falls: Who's Next. Its where you can vote on the remaining people in the town and guess who will be next so we hope we get picked UP!!
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Brian Melanson
Full Member
Showrunner & Co-Admin
One Change. One Chance
Posts: 207
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Post by Brian Melanson on Jul 15, 2009 13:58:32 GMT -5
UPDATED!!! PILOT IS COMING SOON!
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Brian Melanson
Full Member
Showrunner & Co-Admin
One Change. One Chance
Posts: 207
|
Post by Brian Melanson on Jul 22, 2009 19:39:47 GMT -5
THE PILOT WILL BE RELEASED TOMORROW AT 3:30 EST. Just some tweaks to be made to it. It will be 35 pages equivalent to a 30 minute live pilot. I promise not to disappoint! Who do you think will die first?
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Brian Melanson
Full Member
Showrunner & Co-Admin
One Change. One Chance
Posts: 207
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Post by Brian Melanson on Jul 23, 2009 15:39:14 GMT -5
PILOT IS UP!
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Brian Melanson
Full Member
Showrunner & Co-Admin
One Change. One Chance
Posts: 207
|
Post by Brian Melanson on Aug 17, 2009 18:15:05 GMT -5
Alright So this Series is still alive!!!!! I'm no longer gonna put it to rest I'm going to re-do it all!!! Its will be the same but will update the pilot and stuff and do some things!!
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